> Vaginismus: fear of pain on penetration. The faq

I met a girl that sits very well with me (and I with her) and più time he wanted to tell me this thing… we have not yet had reports. (omissis) Has had in the past men to be careless and an experience that has traumatized her.

And this, I think that clarifies the framework with the insensibilità of the first man, and in consequence of the inadequacy of the subsequent (perhaps I take the liberty to infer, also sought unconsciously). Now I will be there. And she has great trust in me, trust that I would not betray, with proper preparation and a sensitivityà.

I Would like to understand some things: For example that of the vaginismus is a state of spastic, which occurs only at the time of penetration through the stiffener….and c’is the fear of pain? I don’t know…. if she is virgin or not, I have asked for and technically I do not know. I’d love to receive some advice and if some text (not overly complex but valid) to consult, to be purchased in the library. And then how should I do….or even if it is absolutely necessary to push forward the idea of a therapist (in a specialized case and not just a therapist, I già I?)

vaginismus is an involuntary contraction of the muscles that are located at the entrance of the vagina, which is the case for fear of the pain of the penetration and that is to his times because of the maintenance of the pain.

There are a variety of therapies but as well she will knowà, since that plays a psychotherapy, the central point is that it is necessary for woman with find the spirit to “rebel” to the symptom, which protects it even at the cost of an important limitation. From this point of view, vaginismus parent with the family of phobias.

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Try to convince a person who suffers from claustrophobia to climb in the elevator &is only a frustration for both those who create it and for those who receive it, finchè not è the person who decides to find the way to go up in the elevator.

In this sense is first of all necessary that the girl in question want to get rid of the disorder as a shirt too tight that it has long brought, but want to take off.

it is in fact quite difficult, forò, that can be her to help, as you usually create a vicious circle in that , although she animated of good intentions for both of them, the means to the end of the push to do right thereò that she, the girl, fears, and so can be easy to fear, she will be rejected.

Può not to be essential to do a therapy, that perhaps it would be better to specify, with someone experienced in these disorders, but if you ask a practical advice, it is: do nothing.

do Not ask to make love, not to propose solutions, not insist. Let the girl deal with their own problem, without the interference of having to defend. In other words, not to try to convince the claustrophobic to go up in the elevator, it gets worse only the situation.

Every symptom says something about our history and about our life and if this girl is interested in seriously ( forgive me the banalità ) there will be plenty of time to build a relationship, to listen, to change, to invent a new life different from the previous più serene and fun.

She hopes to have a appropriate sensibiltà and preparation, perhaps you could read some book of the psychologist, Nardone, on the treatment of phobias, for what concerns the specific sexual names reference historical Masters and Johnson and Helen Kaplan, to write again if you want, both in a general sense that if you want to tell me how it is going, sincere wishes and greetings.

See also: Abortion (how and where) Contraception (various systems) Disease sexual transmission (prevention and treatment) vaginal Infections (Causes and cures)

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