> The birth of a child: the psychological aspects of the couple

The woman that the delivery has interrupted that particular imbalance in the physical and of the mind that had created between her and the baby during the pregnancy. In some cases, in the first days after birth, the mother is overcome by a sort of melancholy called “postpartum depression”, which canò present in three moments:


  • , the first in which she cries, you feel fearful and concerned about the absence of maternal feelings (security, affection, etc.), this phase può last usually a few days;

  • the second moment, which canò also last a few months, is constituted by the return home and the beginning of life in contact with the child. C’è the incredible weariness of those who are unable to sleep for one night in a row, the voltage of inclusion in the family of a new component, the changing role vis-à-vis the husband, physical transformations, etc.;
  • the third moment is that in which it addresses the long-term adaptation to maternityà and può last up to a year più.

During this period of life, it is important that the new mom not alone to face a number of problems associated with his role.

A lot of help on a psychological level and practical può come to her from her husband; the moments of despair and depression will be so più to be overcome as the più the neo – father, sarà sensitive and able to stand on the side of the woman.

in Fact, by the time the care the babies have ceased to be a “privilege” exclusive to mothers, but always involve più the father figure in what are the everyday tasks, such as: diaper change, bottle feeding, rocking the baby, etc.,

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with regard To the father and his role within the couple, in the first months of life the child può happen to experience a sense of abandonment, of loss of centralità within the family.

The mom is dedicated exclusively to the child, all the care and attention I have for him, often we assist to a reduction of the activitiesà sexual, etc.

In these cases, we advise the father not to dramatize, to be inclusive, the period is; time is normal.

once you have regained your safety the new mom riacquisterà the role of the woman in the couple and saprà give the husband the attention and care of the first.

However, we do not fail to remember the mothers, of the one part, è important to involve the father in the child’s life, as it helps to make him feel less alone and excluded from that new relationship that you è come to create between mother and child; on the other, to set aside a space in the day to a close relationship with the husband, not neglecting affettuosità and the intimate life.

this all contributes to the bind always più the family around the child to create situations of safety, which strengthen the psychological baggage of all the components.

it Is well at this point to take care of the needs of the infant in relation to the surrounding world and to their parents.

From the psychological point of view, the baby is a helpless, with a strong need for security and that completely depends on the people surrounding him.

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you should Not, forò to underestimate the trends towards autonomy and the baggage of physical and psychic energies già in possession of “small”; these energies are also developed and improved with the passage of time.

And é in this phase, the attributable to the first months of life, parents asked some questions about what it is better to do. Often they " brought to ask counsel, who has già had children, or consult magazines with articles dedicated to “mothers in waiting”, with the risk of having more doubts than before.

È in these cases, in my opinion, advisable to consult a trusted expert (doctor, psychologist, social worker) who can follow both spouses, better if that expert is in the relationship with parents from the beginning of pregnancy. Continuing to speak of the infant, we must say that in this moment is necessary that he experience on sè the compassionate caring of the mother and the father (figure surely essential for the normal psychological development of the child) through functions such as breastfeeding, physical contact, hold it in your arms when she cries, etc.

Many experts have highlighted the importance of maternal care, the relationship between mother and son and as the latter is sensitive to perceptions of psychological, affective, if the mother respond toà in a way gratifying to the requests of the son, the son is hearing and has accepted and loved, and willà to express themselves freely and, on the contrary, if maternal care show coldness or rejection, the “small” sentirà rejected and andrà to form into a sense of insecurity.

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In this regard, it is important that the inside of the pair the father figure is ready to take action là, where the everyday lifeà può give rise to moments of stress or fatigue on the part of the woman.

the father in fact plays an important role in the evolutionary process of the child and it is indispensable that he enjoy the joy of physical contact with the child, by purchasing ability; and proficiency in the early months of life: wash it, change it, pet it, cuddle the baby, play with him, they must become normal occupations on the part of the father.

in Concluding this brief overview on the world of paternità, related to the birth, we emphasize the importance of some of the points in già addressed in the short report – it Is essential that in the couple there is parità and collaboration: Avoid over-dramatization in the face of problems, some of which will find a solution with time and experience;

In case of needà, however, always turn to trusted experts for any advice or perplessità, keeping in mind that the onset of the doubts is completely normal, and that the relative size of them is not difficult at all.

Per approfondire:

After the birth, at home with the child.

Depressione post partum

Page updated on 7/6/2012